As one door closes, the fridge door opens

It really didn't dawn on me- the real reason my figure has remained as is for the last twenty years. I thought it was just my good fortune that while all about me were starting to look their age, I have stayed slim, quite slim and extremely slim!
A lady I used to teach some ten years ago was in my house the other day- after us bumping into each other after almost four years. "I've never forgotten you," she said. I smile. Nor I her. She was part of my best teaching group ever. After her class, teaching just went down hill for me. I have never forgotten any one of that class and am glad to say I am still in touch with a few of them.
        "I wondered what you look like now," she continued. "If you'd put on wieght."
        "Oh no," I say. "This is me." And I admire myself in a way I only do when my clothes are on.

The Lawrences

All I can do is send love and light to the family of Stephen Lawrence. I am  overwhelmed with compassion when I see them  speaking on TV.  Especially with  Mr  Lawrence. He is so softly spoken. He's so composed  and hurt and humble.

I received an email that said 96 boys have been murdered since Steven. I hope it isn't true. Then imagine another eighteen years of fighting for justice on top of that.  It's a long time. I have a child of  seventeen.  There's a generation of boys who have been raised with a backdrop of Steven Lawrence conversations. We would tell our sons, "be careful," while  warning that there'd be noone to pay if they weren't.

A day without roll-ups

Today has been the first time in a long time I have deliberately not brought tobacco!! A whole complete day! I did have a few yearnings and must say I was on the brink of going to the shop, especially when my friend was going on about something to smoke. On the verge I was! Then I thought, "no, that's your craving not mine. Am gonna stay with myself and see what I come up with." And that's what I did. 2nd January and no Amber Leaf roll ups! Who woulda thought!

I'd love to see what my skin would look like with no tobacco. I would love to see how far I could run, how far I could swim! And if the world is coming to an end and there's gonna be all this mad apocalypse stuff, a girl needs lung capacity.  I'm not saying I've stopped, as I haven't. But I'm most certainly going to cut down and begin with more of a balance between tobacco days , and non tobacco days like I used to. The days when I didn't have to be sucking on cigarette paper in order to get through the day.  Well I'm going to see if I can revert to some of that!! Just to see what it feels like.

Another year

Happy New Year to all of us. I hope this is a year of love health and prosperity:For our dreams to come true in all areas of our lives.
2011 was a good year for me. I have been happier than in a long while and accredit that feeling to the laying down of old baggage and stepping into my Higher Self - a much better place to live ones life!

Each year suggests a new start for me, but this year is not about new beginnings. I am not going to start any new projects until I experience successful completion of the ones before!!

2012 is about seeing what I can complete out of a firm belief in my abilities.

In terms of my writing, there is a non fiction work that I started more than a few years ago. It has been revitalised and is now going to come out in the form of a book. The first month of this year is dedicated to COMPLETING that and self publishing in early spring.

As is evident by the amount of posts I put up last year, I should not make any promises about the amount of blogging I will do this year, suffice to say I now have consistent internet in my home- so we shall see! I will send off a piece of creative non fiction somewhere!!

I aim to see the end of 2012 with a wide grin, pleased and happy with my achievements of the year- then I may be ready to start something new. I have twelve months to play with, as do we all. So happy playing in 2012!! And good luck to all of us :-)